In which I learn a valuable lesson about stress and partnership, and a Friday that goes all the way into Saturday morning!
After work last night, I went and had that nice cold cocktail. Yum. Then I jumped into the BBT and drove myself home, windows down, NPR on the radio. Friday! The weekend! Yes!
I decided to go through the mail immediately when I walked in the door. I’d been intending to do it for two weeks, and there was a massive pile of it on the laundry table that I’d been studiously ignoring. I figured if I left it, it would continue to not get done.
Bread came in and we had our usual ‘how was your day?’ conversation. He helped me sort the actual mail from the garbage. [We get mail by the metric ton these days, I swear to God. I even opted out a few years ago, but someone seems to have bought us subscriptions to Consumer Reports and Atlantic Monthly magazines and now we’re back on all the lists. It’s a nasty waste, all that paper.] When I found the bills, I opened them up and added the couple I’d missed to my spreadsheet and showed it to Bread.
“So what’s this?” he asked, reading.
“The bills. The money we need.”
“Hrm. Well, here’s a start,” he said, and handed me a hundred dollar bill. “The mortgage is paid?”
“Yup. This list is just bills, though, no food or gas or smokes or anything!”
“Uh, yeah, I see that.” He grinned at me. “Quit stressing! It’s not even as bad as I’d thought. I’ll handle it. Now, wanna go have a cocktail at the Hideaway?”
And that was it. Gorgeous was right. She’d told me the day before to share the burden with my partner, that that’s what they’re for. So I did, and he said he’d handle it, and he will because that’s what he does. And now I’m not freaked about it any more.
The man actually laughed at me. I’d gotten myself all worked up about it, had been mulling it over for days and days… you see, I do all the bookkeeping: I open the mail, I write all the checks, I pay all the bills. Naturally I have something of a running total in my head, and so I start stressing much earlier than necessary… I think the man actually found it amusing that I’d gotten into a funk about money.
Bastard. (This is the man who has said to me on more than one occasion, “If you’re worried about money, you’ve got nothing to worry about. You can always get more money.”)
Then we went right back to town. We parked at BoSe’s house, walked through the incredibly packed ‘downtown’ area of Fairfield. (It was Art Walk with some kind of Italian Days theme. The square was SRO and there was no parking anywhere.) We had drinks at the Hideaway and started passing out invitations to the barn party. Bread spoke with BoSe a couple of times. Eventually we were tipsy and hungry so we went in search of food.
Every restaurant on the square was SRO. I decided I wanted Los Portales, so we walked over. They were closed. At 8:31 on a Friday night. I was starving and hot and pissed off and nagged Bread into walking two more blocks to University Amoco, which has a new Mexican restaurant called Guadelejara in it. ALSO CLOSED. By then I was hot, pissed off, and my feet hurt ’cause I wasn’t wearing walking shoes. I monstered on Bread a little. He asked me why the hell I was taking my shit out on him, and I said, “What the fuck! You do it to me all the time!” and started marching back up Second street.
We ended up at Torino’s. They’ve updated their menu, so I had ‘manicotti’ and a side salad. It wasn’t brilliant, but it wasn’t pizza either. After that, I felt so much better.
We went next door to the Dead Cock and stayed there partying until one in the morning. Well, Bread left at one — we had a fight in the parking lot first, of course — I stayed and closed the bar. Ray had a little after-hours at her house; we left the bar right after last call and did a whirlwind tidying-up at her place. (It wasn’t dirty. She’d said it was a sty, but basically all we did was tidy things up, take out the trash, and light incense!) It was a fairly small after-hours; bigger than she’d wanted or expected, but not huge. I tried to crash a couple of times but both times she came and found me and asked me what I was doing!
Around four, she told the few remaining stragglers that she was going to bed and threw them out. Then she and I settled for some girl talk, but I basically fell asleep on one of her kids’ bunkbeds. I can’t do that all night shit very well any more.
She woke me up at eight. (Groan.) I sat in her kitchen trying to wake up while she chatted cheerfully about her kids and family and sucked down three cups of black coffee in less that eight minutes. (Ray is so fucking cool.) Then we hopped in her new car — she traded in that monstrous grocery getter for a late 90’s Saab — made a deposit at my bank and headed out of town.
She dropped me off at home before nine, then headed for Ottumwa to pick her man up. I fed the dogs, grabbed the Frapuccinos I’d bought and a glass of ice and headed for the bedroom. My man was sleeping, so I stripped and got in with him. He woke up, we, ah, ‘greeted’ each other, nudge nudge wink wink, then he got up and I went to sleep.
I got up at two, put on a bikini, made tostadas, lounged on the porch in the sun. Ray threatened to swing back by on her way back from Ottumwa tonight. Other than that, no plans. Maybe clean the barn. Go swimming. Eh. It’s Saturday, I don’t have to do shit if I don’t want to! Yay!
In which my stress level? Is a little high.
Today I opened a spreadsheet and listed all our bills in it. We already need more than I’ll even make this month, and it’s only the 2nd. Let me tell you, it gets pretty scary when your spouse is unfortunately unemployed more than he’s employed over the span of a year. Especially when you’re carrying the kind of debt load we are.
I told Bread last week he’s gonna have to get a menial job selling car parts or sweeping floors or something if he can’t find any construction to do. I didn’t get the impression he really understood how bad it is — I do all the bookkeeping so he hasn’t really got a handle on it — hence today’s spreadsheet (aka Visual Aid #1). I think he thinks we can scootch by for a little longer, but we passed that point a couple of months ago.
I actually got served papers last week for an unpaid debt! Served. Papers. By the sheriff. In my own damn driveway. I feel like a fucking college student.
It’s sticky hot out. I’ve been wearing my glasses for two weeks, which makes me feel frumpy. I’m still kinda tired out from that stupid cold I had. I’m driving a big-assed gas-guzzling truck instead of my comfy and economical little jeep because we can’t afford the tires the jeep needs.
I’m gonna be pissed if I have to get a part-time job, I’ll tell you that right now.
So, when I get off work here in a few, I’m going to stop for a cold cocktail. (I have a chit for the Dew Drop, so I don’t even have to scrounge for change.) Then I’m going to go home, put on a bikini, and jump in the triangle pond. I’m going to swim a few laps, get my heart rate up, de-stress a little. Then I’ll lie on the beached dock in the sun and bake. It’ll be calming. It’ll be awesome.
I’ll let Mr. “I know how to cook, I just don’t feel like it much!” figure out how to get dinner out of our mostly empty larder. *chuckle*
In other news, I missed 2 out of 15 in the Pussy or Raw Meat? quiz. (I’m straight and a vegetarian, so I really haven’t seen much of either. That’s my excuse and I’m sticking to it.)
06/06/06 UPDATE:
THE BARN PARTY HAS BEEN CANCELLED.
BREAD AND MUSH WILL BE OUT OF TOWN.
WE’LL HAVE A PARTY WHEN WE GET BACK, WE PROMISE. SORRY!
————————————————————–
In which the party is officially announced!
We’ll be having a barn party on Saturday, June 17th. Be there or be somewhere else!
WHY YOU SHOULD COME:
- There might be a keg. Or two.
- You can BBQ. Bring your own grillables! (Bring a side dish to share, too, if you’re able.)
- Live music! We present the following bands: House 11. Maybe the Jefferson County Green Band, I haven’t asked ’em yet.
- Bonfire! (You can bring something to burn. We prefer couches and very dry Christmas trees.)
- Camping! (Don’t drive drunk! Pitch a tent, stay the night. We’ll figure something out for breakfast when the time comes.)
- Swimming!
- Fishing, even!
- Free parking!
WHO IS INVITED:
- You! You can come.
- You can also come if you’re a canine, but you will probably get absolutely lousy with ticks and fleas as the little fuckers are everywhere this spring, but you will have too much fun to notice mere parasites. Please don’t come if you’re an uncut male, though.
- You can come if you are not a human nor a canine, but a chicken. You may get eaten by a canine, though, so watch out!
- You can come if you are a minor, but you can’t drink. (Minors who arrive already drunk will absolutely piss me off to no end, and will probably find themselves forcibly denied the keys to their vehicles until they are horrifically, awfully, totally stone cold sober.)
- You can come if you are not a human nor a canine nor a chicken, but I’m not sure we’ll have appropriate refreshment for your species. So do as we do: pack it in, pack it out! We hope you like live music! (But any fusion bottles or gravity generators you happen to leave lying around we’ll keep. By the way, we’d really appreciate it if you could refrain from eating the humans and/or the canines, at least during the live music anyway.)
WHERE:
- Driving directions from 2nd & Burlington in Fairfield to our place. Call if you get lost.
In which we add bookmark links to our pages.
Please, if you don’t use WordPress, excuse me while I geek out for just a moment. If you do use WP, use my code! 😉
To add del.icio.us, Digg, Furl, Technorati, Blinklist, and reddit bookmark links to your pages:
1. Copy this code and insert it into your pages. (I put mine into my single.php template.)
2. Download this file, unzip it, and FTP the resulting folder to your template folder (i.e., /wp-content/themes/your-current-theme/.)
Now you’re easily bookmarkable!
– – – – –
Thanks to Exploding Boy for the idea, most of the images, and some of the code.
To this guy for making me want it in the first place.
And this guy for the del.icio.us image.
In which IT’S ALIVE. And weather. And I’m driving the Big Black Truck.
The conjunctivitis in my right eye is all cleared up now. However, the condition has moved to my left eye. So I’m still wearing my glasses, which totally sucks. And not in a good way.
The weather last night was awesome. When I stopped after work for gas, a giant storm was rolling in, complete with freshening breeze and big lowering clouds. I loved it. Midwesterners — myself included — spend a lot of time bitching about the weather because so much of it sucks. But a big intense plains storm is a treat.
In other news, the jeep still doesn’t have tires — we’re flat broke, even though a very cool friend gifted me a little cash for my “tire fund,” which was so unutterably nice — and I’m driving Bread’s big ol’ huge truck. It’s a pretty comfy ride, but it’s so gigantic that I’m chicken to drive it through drive-throughs or the bank. When I went in to make a deposit this morning, the teller asked me why I’d come in and I sheepishly had to explain that I wasn’t man enough to manoeuvre the damned thing between all those posts. I mean, it’s a late model truck. If I scratched it, my hubby’d never let me hear the end of it.
In which there’s dog love.
Just got back from lunch. Bread came and picked me up and we got tacos and sat under a tree at Whitham Woods to eat. Then we stopped at TSC for dog and cat food, then he drove me to the jeep. He’d already changed the tire and it was on its tiny little doughnut.
He took the jeep, I took his truck and came back to work.
Bread brought all three of the dogs into town with him ’cause he wasn’t thinking, and it’s too hot to leave them in a vehicle and too weird to take all three of them to a shop and leave ’em in the jeep while the tires are getting changed. So I’ve got Bindu under my desk because Bread didn’t really want three of them with him. Somehow two are easier to manage than three.
Oh, that blue dog. HOW CUTE IS SHE?!?!?
In which there is sex, band practice, pizza, napping, cheese dreams, swimming, tanning, and a very flat goddamned tire.
The day after our impromptu BBQ/wedding anniversary, I slept in. (All that vodka, yo.) Got up, put on a bikini. It was hot, windy, blustery. Pushing ninety degrees.
I wandered up to the pond. Put my glasses and barrette into my Birks, set my Birks in the center of the floating dock, dove off into the blessedly cool water of the triangle pond.
The rope holding the barrels under the dock broke. It’s been in the water for going on three years now, so I don’t blame it.
When I finished my swim and seal-wiggled myself back up onto the dock, one of the barrels started to escape. I saw it, but thought it would hold. I relaxed there on the hot dock in the sun, listening to my breathing, feeling the water run down my skin, enjoying the heat of the sun and the breeze and being alone on the dock. The water lapped at the dock, the shore… I could hear acres of grass rustling.
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In which we make a delicious drink, class. Do pay the closest attention.
Lemondrop Martini
Ingredients:
juice of 2 lemons
3 oz. vodka
2 oz. simple syrup
ice
Procedure:
1. Fill a cocktail shaker with ice.
3. Add lemon juice, vodka, and simple syrup.
4. Shake vigourously.
5. Strain into martini glasses rimmed with sugar, garnish with a twist.
You may need to adjust your mix slightly depending on the tartness/juicyness of your lemons.
Serves 2.
Simple Syrup
In a small sauce pan, bring 1 c. sugar and 1 c. water to a rolling boil. Remove from heat and allow to cool.
You can store it in the fridge for a bit, but it does tend to mold quickly if you leave it out. Best to make it fresh before your party.
Lazy Girl Version
After the first dozen lemons, I got bored of the procedure and started making my lemondrops in a pitcher instead of in a cocktail shaker, pouring them into my guests’ glasses complete with ice. On a hot day folks drink them fast enough that the ice doesn’t have much time to melt and weaken the drink.
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In which we celebrate a milestone!
Today is our fifth wedding anniversary.
BoSe arranged an impromptu barbeque. People came out to the farm. We ate, we butchered 24 lemons in pursuit of the perfect lemondrop martini, we socialized.
Eight dogs ran around rolling in dead things and barking and humping each other (two of the bitches were in heat).
Bread mowed a path to the triangle pond. At dusk, I swam naked with AmZon while NLW sat on the floating dock.
After dark, we lazed on the porch drinking and smoking. A kamakazi junebug kept putting the single candle out. A few folks left. I got out my guitar and sang a few songs in the dark. The frongs sang in the round pond. AmZon raided the freezer for shots of Jagermeister.
Now everyone’s lazy and mellow, lounging on the porch and chatting.
It was a great day.
In which a tragedy is averted by the judicious application of a skirt.
This baby just now got caught between the panes of one of the windows in my home office and fluttered for awhile. I lowered the window as much as I could, hoping it would be able to get out, but it couldn’t.
So I stuck an article of clothing in there next to it, and eventually it figured out that the cloth, unlike the glass, would give it some purchase and it climbed out.
It sat on top of the skirt for a minute, then flew around the room bonking into the windows for awhile… and then it accidentally hit the open window low enough and escaped!
(I was able to blog this so quickly by snapping a picture with my cell phone and emailing it directly to Flicker and then pressing the “Blog This” button in Flickr. God, I love the Internet.)
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