In which it’s cold and foggy.
lol oregon weather
Category Archives: Life
Yeah, I got my Christmas on
In which Christmas is in two weeks and I finally put up the tree!
How is it Christmas in two weeks?! What the fuck, time. Of course, in Minnesota we’d have already lived through two blizzards and weeks of sub-zero temperatures, so the lack of brutal weather makes it sorta feel like it’s earlier in the year than it is. BUT STILL.
We’d discussed getting a real tree, since we’ve got an entire house and plenty of space, but it looks like we’re not into the idea enough to, you know, actually go out and do it. So! Our sixth year with our tiny baby fake tree!
Here it is, on my guitar case! I just decorated it!
His mom’s been sending us proper, full-sized ornaments for a few years, so I put those on the avocado. Here’s a terrible picture of them!
I did the kitchen right after Thanksgiving, though, so it’s not like I’ve been totally laming off.
The table!
Christmas tea towels!
I hung ornaments from the valances!
So, yeah. You could say it’s quite festive up in here now. Maybe next year we’ll get a full-sized, proper, real tree!
Finally, a fuckin’ BIKE
In which I rode my bike to the store today!
When we moved to M-F I decided I needed a bike.
The grocery store’s a mile away, and there’s no way I’m hauling a gallon of milk an entire mile on foot. Work’s a half mile away, so a bike would cut my already-short commute time in half, plus I could haul stuff — packed lunches, extra jackets — more comfortably.
So there’s a cheap-but-new bike at the College Place Walmart I like, it’s a Scwhinn and it’s cute (I’m totally the demographic, the bike’s clearly designed for middle-aged white chicks; I know it’s tacky as fuck but it appeals to me). I decide I’ll buy it online and go pick it up! And then I’ll have wheels!
This was back before the winter fog set in, when the sun still shone, and there were still leaves on the trees, you dig.
Anyway, so I buy the bike online, easy peasy. Then I check back a couple hours later, and discover it’ll take over a week, nearly ten days, before the bike is ready? What the fuck, it’s literally right there in the fucking store, I’ve seen it, why can’t I have that one?
Oh, well, whatever, a week or so, fine. The reviews say it’ll be assembled, maybe they only have the floor model in stock, I don’t care. I can walk to work for a week.
So it finally comes in, and I ask my better half to go pick it up. He does.
It’s in a box and most definitely not assembled. I pitch a fit, he puts it together because he’s a goddamned SAINT, but parts are missing. The PEDALS are missing, for fuck’s sake.
So I open a ticket with Schwinn, and they send the missing parts. It takes about a week.
The parts arrive, I finish assembly, but because I’m an ass I don’t bother to adjust it, and the first time I try to ride the bike to work the derailleur goes into the spokes.
ARRGGHH!
So I contact Schwinn again to try to buy a replacement derailleur, and even though their documentation explicitly says bad adjustment is not covered by warranty, they send me a replacement for my fucked up derailleur for free. KILLER customer support.
There’s some delay with the package; it takes ten more days to arrive.
I read up on replacing derailleurs and watch a couple YouTube videos and think, “Fuck this, I’m taking it to a shop.” I mean, we have a garage and some tools, but I don’t have a bike stand and I’ve never done it before and it just looks like something I’d rather pay for.
Well, of course there’s no bike shop here, and I have no car of my own, and I work Saturdays, and all the bike shops in nearby towns are closed on Sundays, and and and, so it takes awhile to get the stupid thing to a shop. Like, another week or ten days.
But we did finally get it done, and he picked it up for me yesterday on his day off (because HE’S AMAZING), and today I rode my bike to the store for the first time!
Yay!
It was glorious weather for a maiden voyage: bright overcast and cool. Allegro Cyclery adjusted it perfectly: shifts great, brakes great. The cheap saddle bags I bought seem to have turned out to be a remarkably good deal! And they’re lighter than the Wohl chrome baskets I’ve always preferred, which definitely matters now that I’m fat.
Having not ridden much in years, I have no quads, which sucks, but they’ll come back. Turns out the journey to Safeway is all sliiiiightly uphill, but check it: the journey back is all slightly downhill! Fortuitous! I don’t have to pedal much when hauling groceries! Whoo! Coasting rules!
I didn’t go in, because I don’t have a bike lock and I would absolutely flip my shit if the very first time I take the bike out I get the stupid thing stolen, but I’ve finally Been To The Store On My Bike, and it took a long while to achieve this feat, and I am SO pleased and SO stoked I just can’t even tell you.
I timed the ride from work to home: it’s four minutes. I have a four-minute work commute now. How glorious is that?!
I’ll just order a bike lock online and drive the Jeep over to Safeway later for the weekly shop, like a gas-guzzling asshole American.
Laundry
In which THIS IS THE WEEK the washer and dryer come!!!
My favorite aunt bought us a washer and dryer.
We ordered them back in October, but they had to be shipped in, I guess, and we had to wait a couple months for delivery.
They’re due ON TUESDAY, and they’ll go in this very corner right here:
It’s stupid to be excited about what is typically a boring chore, but I’m really very excited to do a bunch of laundry! In my kitchen!
A Proper Kitchen Table
In which it’s perfect and I love it so much!
We got a kitchen table (from an old BMI co-worker of mine, who offered it via Instagram when I posted we’d gotten this house to rent and needed furniture — thanks, Mike!) and it’s in the kitchen now and it’s exactly the right size and shape and it’s so great.
Like, I couldn’t have gone out looking and found a table more exactly what should be in this kitchen. It fits the space perfectly. It’s sturdy and rectangular and comfortable and not too tall.
This kitchen is ideal. I don’t know if I’ve ever liked a kitchen as much as I like this one, even if the fridge is in a sort of weird spot. There are windows, and soon there will be a washer and dryer (thanks, aunt Sue!), and there’s tons of counter space and tons of cupboards and it’s both big and cozy, and there’s a dishwasher!
And over the table is a bank of daylight ceiling lights, so it’ll be a perfect place to read and write or watercolor or knead bread or mend or sew, even at night.
I ate Sunday brunch (pot of tea, oven roasted potatoes, and a broccoli & cheddar fritatta) at the table today! With place mats and dishes and everything! Hurrah!
The table is used and worn, but I fucking love it, exactly as it is. It’s like it was made to be in this house!
The only problem with this house is that it’s too great. Next time we move will be a disappointment no matter what, but hopefully it won’t be for years.
Dishwasher
In which I love this goddamned appliance, okay?
I cooked three full meals in this kitchen today, for a total of eight courses, and I have not done the washing up.
Look at it. Just look. It’s spotless. No dishes anywhere. THEY’RE IN THE DISHWASHER, off the counter, out of sight.
It’s amazing. I never wanted a dishwasher, but now I doubt I could stand life without one.
This kitchen has tons of counter space, I could easily fill them up entirely with dishes dirty or clean — but I don’t have to! Because: DISHWASHER!
This house is so great.
In which I just don’t enjoy Facebook anymore because it’s full of disinformation and depression and conspiracy theories and none of that’s any fun.
Just logged into FB for the first time in a couple of weeks and my last post turned into the biggest conversation on my page in years.
I find this funny, for some reason?
And no, I don’t think you suck, babies. You’re all welcome to post whatever comments you like here, no censorship, or, hell, I’ll even give you a login if you want to post actual entries, I don’t care, but I do think Facebook sucks and fuck their AI and their algorithms and their entire whatever!
—
Update: scrolled the main page for half an hour and it’s still a dumpster fire. Headlines that are immediately seen to be garbage if a person’s even mildly rational. “Rifles” are not the problem in mass shootings, mammograms do not “cause cancer,” and no, CBD oil doesn’t “cure” autism. I wrote and deleted three replies, because “this is demonstrably untrue” isn’t fun or interesting and just ends up making everybody butthurt.
Delete the internet, it’s stupid!
Oh, AND I found out my college roommate has died. Facebook is depressing, y’all.
This house is so great!
In which I’ve moved to Oregon, a state I haven’t lived in since the early 90’s!
We found a house in Milton (or is it Freewater?) and have moved into it. It’s an eight-block walk from the cheese shop for me, and I’m grateful that it cuts his commute in half.
Big old tree in the yard! Brick flower boxes along the whole front (in which I will probably plant food — tomatoes and herbs)! Tons of parking (there’s more around the far side you can’t see in this picture), in case we have, I don’t know, a small concert?
Our neighbor to the north is a creek and an apple orchard.
Our street is adorable:
Six houses on a dead end! No through traffic! Cute and quiet, and we’ll never see another fender bender! So far, the loudest sounds we’ve heard are dogs (this town is rife with canine Americans; there are at least a dozen who woof at me on my walk to and from work) and the engines of our neighbors’ vehicles.
Guys, THIS HOUSE IS SO GREAT. It’s so great. It’s positively lovely and I guarantee you I don’t deserve it. It has every amenity we could want, from two bedrooms to a garage to a second bathroom. There’s a dishwasher, tons of cupboards, a coat closet and a linen closet, and a built-in curio cabinet!
(The owner told me she’d kept Precious Moments in it, back in the day, and isn’t clear now why she ever did, but there it is: a place for my teapots and other random ephemera.)
Look at the light in this, the main bathroom! I love it! (And the fan actually works. It’s like a hotel bathroom, with a high shower head and plenty of room and shelves for products.)
The second bathroom is full-sized, and has a window and a shower with a sitting bench in it. I don’t know that we’ll ever use it much ourselves, but it’ll be handy if we have guest.
There’s also an enormous back yard surrounded by a privacy fence.
There’s no exit from the house to the back yard (you have to go outside and through a fence gate to enter it), and when I look at it all I think is “YARD WORK,” but my aunt let us take an abandoned lawn mower from the shed in the yard of a house she owns and my better half seems to be fine with the idea of keeping it up, so I intend to mostly ignore the entire space since there’s so much front yard and porch and concrete apron to enjoy. We’ve already discussed getting a BBQ, which I expect we’d never bother dragging into the back yard unless we were having a large gathering.
If there are any flaws, they are these: there are very few grounded outlets, the stove is electric (I’ve already burnt three dishes), and the glorious kitchen sink window looks into the garage rather than at the orchard.
The garage has a window, thankfully, but still, I’m sure the view was much better before the garage was built.
We don’t have any furniture except for the desk he bought for his computer, but the family is going to give us some chairs and a dresser!
The bedrooms have lovely wood floors, and built-in heating.
The LR has a heat exchanger in the wall and two windows. The place came with curtains, lace in the kitchen and living room and neutral panels in both bedrooms. So much storage. So well laid-out.
It’s so nice to be reunited with our stuff after nearly four months; I’m particularly happy to have my dishes and pots and pans, and the rest of my wardrobe. We’re 75% unpacked and very comfortable.
Yay amazing new house!
Hello, I’m old and it’s weird
In which I’ve gone and turned 51, of all things, and here is a short paragraph about it.
I’m fat as hell, my feet always hurt even though I only work part-time, my skin has no elasticity and is just drooping like fabric on the bias, I have a nearly constant stabbing pain in the index knuckle of my right hand, my hips hurt, I have nerve issues in my feet due to, according to google hospital, either menopause or neuropathy that occasionally drive me bugnuts when I’m lying in bed trying to go to sleep, sometimes I can’t sleep, or I wake wide up for no goddamned reason at all, my teeth are yellow, my desire to go out and hang with people is nearly as low as my introvert better half’s, I’m more or less running out of British TV shows to watch, I’ve been so sedentary for so long that popping up two flights of stairs here in the house makes me pant for three minutes, whatever symmetry my face may once have enjoyed is well and truly over, HOT FLASHES, sometimes everything from ovaries to vestibule feels weird as hell because hormone changes and so-called sexual atrophy, there’s no fat at all on the balls or heels of my feet, vericose veins, I’ve actually sharted, something I always thought was either a joke or an affliction affecting only young, stupid beer drinking males, twice in the past three years, my hair is thin and brittle, my nails are ridged, I think about death a lot and find sex scenes and courting plots juvenile and annoying, I have actually heard myself say “nobody’s writing any decent sci-fi these days,” I’m freaked about the fact I’ve never made any money and owe more in student loans than I’ve saved for retirement, my nose and ears are enormous and are just going to keep getting bigger, my eyebrows have discovered what it is to be tufty, my ass has changed shape to such a degree that I now fart like a man, and my sweat smells weird and old.
But it’s also true that I’m not on any meds at all*, which I’ve been told by a doctor friend is “unusual” for “someone my age.”
*yet
HOW HAS IT BEEN TWO MONTHS ALREADY?!?
In which where DOES the time go?
It’s September?!
I’ve been at the cheese shop for a month and a half now and really enjoy it. My friend got a job there too, so I have someone to ride to work with now that my beloved is working at the casino and can’t chauffeur me around everywhere.
We’re still at my grandmother’s house but are considering moving to Milton Freewater to shorten his commute and remove my need for a car. (I really don’t want to buy a car. They’re wasteful as fuck in terms of resources, and you have to throw money at them ALL. THE. TIME. Gas, maintenance, insurance, registration, parking. Yuck.) I also really want my stuff back, in particular my kitchen and the rest of my wardrobe, and we’ve been leaving the Ubox in storage until we’re fully settled.
I love living in this house in this neighborhood, but if we stay much longer I’m going to need a refrigerator and a hot plate and an area rug and MY CLOTHES and probably some other stuff I’m not thinking of right now. (I can and do cook in my grandmother’s kitchen, but rarely. I cook weird stuff at weird hours and I need my own kitchen space.)
I also want a proper desk and a second monitor and keyboard; I computer very little right now because it’s a pain in the ass. Mostly using my laptop for streaming, and do most of my internet fucking around on my phone. Could easily set up a workstation here in the basement, but keep not doing it because we might move out any minute AND OUR STUFF IS IN A UBOX IN PASCO OR RICHLAND SOMEWHERE.
I’ve seen both my parents, my brother, two aunts, an uncle, and of course my g’ma. I’ve seen TONS of friends and fans and gotten lots of hugs and kisses and emails and texts. I played at Marcy’s last Saturday and literally dozens of people came out to see me.
After living an almost entirely socially isolated life in Minneapolis for the past five years, I can’t even express how deeply fulfilling and satisfying it is to get to love on so many people!
I have a friend whose mom owns a restaurant, so I GOT CUSTOM ARTICHOKE COTIJA TAMALES, even.
It’s never what you know, and always who you know!
Plus the weather here, the goddamned amazing weather. Sure it’s hot during the day, but it’s dry, and it always cools down 20-30 degrees at night, so you can actually sleep even without A/C in the attic bedroom.
AND THE PRODUCE. OH MY GOD, THE PRODUCE. I’ve had a perfect peach, a couple of Hermiston melons, veggies from my aunt’s garden, and I made pico de gallo from heirloom tomatoes a cheese shop customer gave me — FOR FREE — because he didn’t sell them at market.
You don’t get produce like this in the city, you just don’t. There’s some amazing produce to be had in cities, sure, with co-ups and CSAs and stuff, but it’s nothing like living in farm country. You get stuff here that was literally in the garden that very morning, and it all tastes like happiness and sunshine.
We’ve been to a ball game, restaurants, bars, a couple shows, and people’s houses for BBQs. Look at this food I ate at Embo’s house!
We have A Social Life and it’s wonderful! We’ve been shopping, on Sunday drives, and across Stateline (between Washington and Oregon) too many times to count.
We’ve done more stuff in the past two months than in the past five years, probably, and it’s easy here because the whole town’s barely five miles across and the traffic is actually reasonable (rather than millions of passive-aggressive Minnesotans).
I’m so super happy to be home, to have people again, to have a good job, and my better half seems to like it here too! (I actually knew a couple of old online blogger people in MSP, but never managed to meet up with them. Somehow never felt like taking a few buses all the way to Saint Paul and back. Kind of regret it now, but obviously not enough to have actually done it in five whole years, so. I don’t know. Combination of distance and weather, I guess?)
Deeply looking forward to the season change, a proper autumn and sweater weather (there’s no fall in MSP, as I’ve complained for the past half decade), and then the holiday season rituals with family living nearby! We’ll probably GO to a Thanksgiving meal! Or a Christmas one! I’m so excited to be back that I probably won’t even briefly consider trying to get out of it this year!
If we’re in an apartment by X-mas, I might even splurge on a real tree, just for the hell of it!