Doctors are ashamed of how much they charge for things.

You learn this when you’re uninsured. They say, “No insurance, right?” and you nod. And then they proceed to skip tests and prescribe the cheapest pills in their arsenals.

This is, I think, because they know they overcharge insurance companies for things like strep swabs.

In a nutshell, I was not tested for strep, but it was assumed I have strep because, and I quote, I’m “too old for mono.”

I’m to take this bottom-shelf antibiotic (only thirteen dollars!) and call in if I don’t feel better by Wednesday, because the good doctor told me he saw a guy recently whose throat looked as bad as mine and his bacteria didn’t respond to the bottom-shelf antibiotic and had to be killed with some expensive, bovine-strength antibiotic.

Lord, I’m so fucking happy. Not. (At least my sweet GP is reluctant to prescribe the bovine-strength antibiotic. A point in his favor.)