In which I complain.

I need a simple, clean, working 3-column WP theme (because I’m tired of the one I’ve been using for the past two years or so!). Today I went to the Theme Viewer, searched for Widget-ready 3-column themes, downloaded six of them, and tested them out.

Three didn’t work at all — bad coding. Two work technically but won’t work with my content because I have too many Pages and it fucks up the layout. (Most themes expect fewer than five Pages, but I have a lot.) One doesn’t work in IE. The final one is groovy looking but it’s not clean enough, not simple enough. I want goblinbox.com to be utterly accessible and readable. I don’t like sites that are overwhelming; if you want to dig through my sidebar that’s cool, but mostly I want you to read the post, comment if you’re moved to do so, and not have to do a lot of scrolling and clicking and crap to do it.

On top of all of that, I no longer have Fireworks installed so I can’t tweak images, which bums me out and means I have a hard time incorporating my logo into new layouts. All in all, highly unsatisfactory. I’ll probably go back to my old stand-by tomorrow. *grumble*

Update:
I tried a variety of templates and they all have problems save this one. They don’t work in IE (I HATE IE OMFGWTFBBQ), they don’t work with my content, they aren’t Widgetized, they suck, I don’t like them, you don’t like them, or they’re just ugly. So I settled with this one. At least it’s clean.

 

10 Responses to WordPress Themes

  1. ~pj says:

    Yesterday I caught a green theme that I liked. It was clean and loaded fast. Important for those of us on the dark ages dial-up.

    Dial-up!?!? 😉 -m

  2. Cootera says:

    Ugh. I hope you do go back to your old template. This one is so bloody scrambled.

    Okay, okay. Sheesh. 😉 -m

  3. Brad says:

    I know the feeling, when my site isn’t working properly or I can’t make it do what I want, I get all pissy and stuff.

    It fucking SUCKS, dude! -m

  4. Alex says:

    Well, I think you should use the “Teenager’s MySpace Page” theme.

    How they make it SO UGLY?! *groan* -m

  5. naomi says:

    i rather like this one. but if you want simplicity then i guess your search goes on…and i’m missing from your blog listings again. *sigh* i’ve settled on my template for now, but i’m going to look some more…it’s not quite the way i want things to look.

    WHY DOES YOUR BLOG INSIST ON FALLING OFF MY DAMN BLOGROLL?!??! -m

  6. Topher says:

    Liked the green one more somehow (This coming from a guy whose favorite color is blue)

    Hmm. -m

  7. Topher says:

    LOL, weird. I commented and the template changed right after. I like the smaller.

    I want to change mine, but don’t know where to start. Nite Mush!

    I change ’em a lot while I’m testing. -m

  8. Cootera says:

    THIS is a nice template…

    Yeah? -m

  9. Glenn says:

    How does one respond to your emails, my dear?

    Take “nospam” out of my addy, hon. -m

  10. dharma says:

    Hm, I am not enamored. Sorry hon. I think the 3 column could work, but maybe if you post is in the middle. Since we traditionally (most of us read left to right) there is a lot of busy on the left. Ya know? Cause you have an awful lot of material over there.

    True. Hmm. -m