Holy fuck I’m boring

December 27th, 2012 | Posted by Mush in Life

In which I blog.

What’s going on? Well, not much, really. Workin’ my 40-a-week, trying to get projects done but feeling scattered because every time I get into a groove — which in itself is a feat because this shit is soooo tedious — my phone rings and there’s some human being saying incomprehensible shit to me and expecting me to be both psychic and telekinetic.

I have customers call me up and say literally nothing at all intelligible and I’m supposed to somehow know that they’re having trouble sending email? It’s bizarre. And I’m not saying they don’t know computer jargon; I mean they don’t know how to communicate information in their native language. I’ve been doing support long enough that I can parse ‘letter’ for ‘email,’ or ‘router’ for ‘modem.’ What I cannot parse is sentences such as, “Well your status is wrong because it says all systems are operational but they’re not because mine won’t show the thing it just sits there!”

Your what won’t show what? The fuck, people. I NEED SOME FUCKING NOUNS. Are you trying to tell me your monitor is broken? That you can’t load a web page? That your email client has crashed? MINE WON’T SHOW THE THING is a fucking useless string of words. Some of these people literally blow my fucking mind. Like, just this morning a man called me and said his device was broken, but after about ten minutes of listening to him drone on and on about literally nothing I finally came to understand that he had called simply because his connection had dropped and he was too stupid to click Connect again.

I mean, for fuck’s sake, how am I supposed to fix that kind of stupid? You get online, you switch to your browser, you write an email, and perhaps your connection drops AS THEY SOMETIMES DO, you click Send, and you get an error. If you are not fucking bright enough to switch back to your connection management software and click the big giant goddamned Connect button on your own, WHAT THE FUCK CAN I POSSIBLY DO ABOUT IT? This is not tech support, people, it’s HOW DO YOU NOT DROWN IN THE SHOWER.

My Flickr stream lately is all office self-portraits and food. This is not because I never do anything fun — I mean, I even went flash caroling last week with a big group of people and had an absolute riot of a fun time — but because my phone sucks at low-light images and it’s pretty much always dark when I’m not at work. The self-portraits are for my various stalkers (the notes I get on those pics are pretty amusing, usually, along the lines of “uh, this particular surveillance cam image makes me wanna bang you for some reason,” which is both gratifying and creepy). The food isn’t up to bento par, but I’m doing some modified Atkins to drop some inches I don’t want, so I’m mostly just diarying.

There are some Xmas pictures. I never really got into the Christmas spirit this year, to be quite frank. I’m grateful the weather is still above freezing, but I’m getting tired of the constant grey and I’m still not doing well with my 8 o’clock starting-work time because I simply cannot adjust to getting out of bed when it’s still dark out. (I’m also waking up in the middle of the night pretty much every night now; I still get eight or more hours of sleep but now it’s in two sessions, which bugs me endlessly.)

Eh. Enough bitching. Suffice it to say that it’s dark all the time, I’m fairly bored with my life as a whole because it’s so terrifyingly static, and I really need a vacation. (This year I hope to take two: a week to see Amma, of course, and another to just go somewhere and be a tourist.)

Yes, hello, winter blahs here. Heh. Let me say at least one nice thing, which is that pesto scrambled eggs with brie — which is what I made myself for breakfast this morning — is fucking delicious.

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